Tell them, or let them figure it out
By
Scinadr
,
Nov 13 2008
After I saw Melanie's Tweet http://twitter.com/SavvyAuntie/status/1004639098 about Savvy Auntie's article in Planet Out and gay.com, I sent her a note expressing my gratitude for her participation and suggested I start a thread about this topic. She encouraged me to do so...so here goes.
My partner and I have been together for 3 years. Someday I hope to have kids myself but for right now, my nieces and nephew are "our" kids. They call my partner "Aunt" Kelli. When she is not with me, the kids make me call her just so they can talk to her. Recently, I took the kids to the pet store and a Husky walked in. Since the kids know we have two Huskies, they made me take a picture of the dog, email it to Kelli and then call her to tell her. They have been to our house but never asked questions until recently. Michael (8) asked me why I am not married. I wasn't really sure how to answer it and looked at my sister as if to say, "Do you want me to tell him or are you going to?" In the end we did the whole "change of subject thing."
This year, the family is coming to our house for Thanksgiving. While I don't anticipate any questions, you just never know. Kids will ask when they want, and I believe this time, I need to be prepared. If I was to never tell them, they are smart enough to figure it out or hear about it from another kid on the bus!
Just curious, has anyone dealt with a similar situation where they needed to tell their niece & nephew because the parents either couldn't or were not comfortable? Of if the parents did explain it to the kids, how did they go about it?