Dear Savvy Auntie,
I have a 2-year-old nephew whom I love every much, so I am very opinionated about how to raise him and can come off very overbearing. I know it's not my place to comment about how his parents (and my family) raise him but I can't help it. I don't agree with how they raise him.
For example, after taking him off the bottle, they are reintroducing the bottle again because they fear he's not getting enough milk. I suggested making fruit smoothie with milk but I was shot down by my family (not by his parents because they are not confrontational). Or, that they soothe him with TV when they wake him up because he didn't go to sleep on schedule, a schedule that is not enforced.
These are just a few of the many bad habits they are introducing to him. It might be insignificant, but I fear that history is repeating itself. I have a nephew who is 22-year- old and I think he is addicted to video games. He hardly comes out of his room to eat. And my brother (his uncle) is really hard on him, even though this same uncle played video games with him when he was 5-years-old until midnight. My 22-year-old nephew is paying the price of bad parenting and being blamed for his shortcomings. My family hasn't realized he is the way he is because of his upbringing.
I was a part of the problem. Where everyone gives him no boundaries, I did the opposite; I doubled-down to compensate for everyone else. I have hurt him, and our relationship is very tense. I don't want to repeat the same thing with my 2-year-old nephew. But it seems I am heading down the same path because everyone refuses to change their ways. But I know if I continue to comment on everything, I will do more harm than good. So how do I move pass this and love (instead fear) my nephew for whomever he will become?
Opinionated Auntie