No parent or aunt ever wants to learn that their child or niece or nephew is diagnosed with autism. It can be devastating news.  And for many aunts, your role includes not only the development and nurturing of the child, but supporting and helping the parents too. Here's how you can help.

First, let's start with the basics. What exactly is autism, and how can you be an autistic child's savvy aunt?

What is Autism?

Autism is a neurobiological disability, part of a group of disorders known as autism spectrum disorders (ASD). Children with autism have difficulty relating to others, behaving appropriately in social settings, acquiring and using language skills, and communicating. As the name implies, there is a wide spectrum of severity within autism, from high functioning to low functioning. Any number of other disabilities may accompany autism, such as learning disabilities or sensory dysfunction. A few--but by no means most--people with autism may have special skills (known as savant syndrome).

Most people with autism are first diagnosed between the ages of 2 and 5. The indicators can include delayed language acquisition or a sudden loss of language skills. Keep in mind, child who takes longer to start talking does not necessarily have autism. Six out of 1000 children are autistic, and boys are three to four times more likely to develop autism than girls are.

There is no cure, but through early and intensive therapy many children with autism and their families can curb symptoms and cope. Some medications have been known to help as well. Still, autism affects an individual for a lifetime.

What Can You Expect?

Children with autism tend to seem as if they are in their own world. They may not respond to you when you address them directly, and may not wave hello or goodbye. However, these children do hear quite well and have emotional responses to the way people treat them, even if they do not show these emotional responses in a way you recognize. Autistic children often have behavioral issues and appear to act inappropriately, like an undisciplined child. This is not the result of bad parenting! Traditional parenting techniques rarely work for autistic children, and parents have to work with therapists and other professionals to manage their autistic child. This is always a difficult, inexact process that gets even more challenging as the child enters adolescence. Parenting an autistic child is exhausting, absorbing work, and your sister or brother may seem to have disappeared into their child.

Top 5 Things You Can Do to Help!

1. First, learn everything you can about autism. Get informed on the symptoms, the treatment, the issues, and the specifics of your niece or nephew's case.

2. Help connect your sibling to support groups and networks for families dealing with autism. Some examples include Interactive Collaborative Autism Network, Interactive Autism Network, Autism International Network, and Autism Speaks.

3. Be supportive and avoid criticizing your sibling or in-laws. Jene Aviram's essay, Don't Say This to Parents Whose Children Have Autism, is particularly instructive!

4. Set up a WELLalarm account for your niece or nephew, so his or her parents can manage their child's health records, keep track of doctors and appointments, and most importantly, prepare for an emergency.

5. Roll up your sleeves and babysit. Parents of autistic children often hear the advice, "take time out for yourself!" Taking a break for rejuvenation is extremely helpful, but who is going to take care of their child for them? Who can they trust? Get to know your niece or nephew, learn how your sibling or in-laws manage their child, and then offer to babysit on a regular basis. You can be an integral part of their support network!