How to Help Friends and Family Survive the Holidays with Infertility
Editor's Note: While some Savvy Aunties are coping with infertility themselves, others have friends and family who are dealing with fertility challenges this holiday season. Here's how to help them cope best.
By Dr. Sheeva Talebian, MD, a top reproductive endocrinologist with CCRM New York.
Going through infertility during the holidays can be difficult, especially since most holiday events involve families with young children. It is important to remember that no advice is going to take that pain away from those who are having difficulty conceiving. However, here are a few suggestions on how to best be supportive of a friend or a relative who is experiencing infertility issues during the holiday:
Don't be afraid to ask. Many people think the best way to handle the subject of infertility is to avoid the subject. In this case, things are not better left unsaid. Go ahead and ask them how they are doing. Give them the opportunity to talk if they want. Chances are they will open up and be grateful that you cared enough to ask.
Lend an ear. Take a few moments to lend an open, non-judgmental ear to your friend or family member who is experiencing fertility issues. Be supportive and empathetic. Often they just need to know that others hear their struggles and they will appreciate being heard.
Plan a fun activity. Fertility treatments can become very overwhelming and heavy on the heart and mind. Fun activities can be soothing to the soul. Ditch the requisite holiday party and book a spa day, go for a pedicure, or go see a funny movie. Your friend will appreciate the effort.
Go for a walk together. Often times people going through infertility keep a lot inside and don't always feel comfortable sharing. Offer to go for a walk or plan a hike through a scenic trail. Long walks in a beautiful setting helps to clear the mind from anxiety and depression.
Share and share alike. Just because your friend is going through infertility doesn't mean that you shouldn't share what is happening in your own life, good or bad. Don’t be afraid to share. People going through infertility often love to hear the latest updates in their friends' lives as a welcome distraction.
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Dr. Sheeva Talebian, M.D., is a board-certified reproductive endocrinologist who came to CCRM NY after 8 years of practice in the tristate area. She graduated Magna Cum Laude and Phi Beta Kappa from Columbia University and went on to obtain her medical degree from Mount Sinai School of Medicine. She continued her medical training at New York University where she completed her residency in Obstetrics and Gynecology and fellowship in Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility. Dr. Talebian is a member of the American Congress of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) and the American Society of Reproductive Medicine (ASRM). Areas of research include ovarian reserve testing, PGD, and fertility preservation. She is the recipient of several surgical and teaching awards and recently named to the SuperDoctors Rising Stars list. Experienced in the area of surrogacy, egg donation, and same sex reproduction, Dr. Talebian serves as director of third party reproduction at CCRM NY.
Photo: Gladkov
Published: December 21, 2016